I keep having the feeling that I've to study

Why?

I could only come up with two valid reasons.

1. I'd studied a lot
2. I'd studied too much

And I could make two conclusions out of the reasons above.

1. I'm a nerd.
2. I kiasu.

The worse conclusion may be both a nerd and a kiasu.

Whatever it is, I'm certain I'm number one. As with number two, I'm still hesitant to label myself that. Don't bother giving me that look.. I'm not.

That aside, I've been looking online for games that I can download and play for free. Yes, I like playing games but I'm not an avid gamer... only when I'm free.

Speaking of games, for those of you who didn't know, I used to play FIFA and other sporting games, C & C, RA, NFS, CS, Max Payne, etc. when I was young. Thanks to my brother, I enjoyed playing those games but never won any against him. I particularly enjoyed Max Payne, the game but not the movie although I haven't watched it (heard that it isn't nice). It seems odd everytime I mention that I play those games to a guy the first time.

Interestingly, what you should know if you are a guy is that, not all girls play barbie dolls and dress up when they were young. I, for one, am not one of them. I was the one playing "police", "masak-masak", football with my brother, cars, legos and of course computer/video games. I was the type who enjoyed seeing guys having fun playing their computer games than girls putting on make up.

Funny but interesting enough, I wasn't all that good with the computer games, and yet I enjoyed it so much I find myself going back to playing them even when I became older. Like now, if only I had those cds with me... or newer versions which are even better, I could relive my long lost hobby again. I can really understand how gamers can just sit all day long in front of the computer playing... it really is addictive... but thank God I'm not like them.

And thank God again, I grew out of enjoying so much of boy stuff and realised that I am a girl after all even though I had always wished to be otherwise. Too much information, I know.

At 13, where most teenage girls would fancy trying to put make up on their faces, I, for one, wasn't the least fascinated with such endeavours. I did not hate them nor did I like them. I just didn't think it was necessary to do such things for a kid my age.

Somehow I realise the more I continue on this, I know it will take ages to describe my life history. That's why I think I should just stop here and not let too much information about myself... It's just... not safe.

In case you're wondering. I'm still a girl. Duh.